Today I am reminded of my frailty.
That is partly because there is death on my mind, but partly because today is Ash Wednesday, which kicks off the season of Lent. I never grew up embracing Lent (I didn’t understand it much so I wrote it off as something that was only for Catholics). I am, however, learning that since we are all supposed to point to the story of God that unfolds in our own lives, it is impossible to pass through the season of Lent, pretending that Christ’s journey toward the cross is something that has no effect on me. So, I am trying to learn to find the beauty in all the brokenness.
Today, I am practicing the sober awareness of our frailty, sins, and smallness. With ashes on my forehead in the shape of a cross, I am remembering that it is from dust I came, and dust I will return. I am seeking after a renewed and clean heart for God. I am learning about letting go. I am learning about forgiveness and redemption.
I am reminded of my frailty. For once, I would like to be able to go home and not have to attend a funeral, especially not of someone that I loved very much and will miss very much. Life is frail. I cannot hide from that.
However, there is still hope. There is hope because we know what we are journeying toward: Resurrection. Christ has the victory over death, and even though this is somber day, I know that I must hold tight to the joy that I have in Christ. He has victory over the grave! He has died, he has risen, and he will come again. I can have new life when I come to Him. I can lay this all down. After all, all this pain and hurt and sadness, it was never mine to hold.
(On the practical side, I am not really sure what to give up for Lent, so instead I am taking something on. I am going to work toward memorizing the book of Philippians. I am looking forward to this.)