I just want somebody to tell me if red nail polish is trashy or classy. Whatever the case, it is currently adorning my nails. Speaking of trashy, guess who wore short shorts (that you could even see because the rain coat I was wearing was longer) and rain boots to Wal-Mart last night? That’s right; this girl. Never fear, though, because on the trashy-classy scale, I tend to stay pretty straight on the classy side. In case you don’t believe me, the division secretary of the office at which I work asked me today if I had any interest in fashion because I always look so nice. She also told me that if she could pick a personal shopper, it would be me. Which, is just about one of the nicest compliments I have ever received in my whole life. I was probably blushing.
Anyway, if you know me, you know that I like things planned out. Seriously, I almost couldn’t find my planner the other day and just about lost my mind. However, at this current place in my life I have no idea what I am doing for the summer (or, really, I don’t even have definite plans for next fall either). I am going a little bit crazy. I am meeting with my advisor in about a half hour, and I am sure that I will start crying. I should resolve right now that I will not start crying. After all, someday I will need to call upon him for a letter of recommendation and I don’t want him to write, “She’s a good worker, but I think all she does is cry.” You heard it here: I will not cry. Not because crying is wrong, but because it is like C. S. Lewis wrote in his book, The Silver Chair, “Crying is all right in its way while it lasts. But you have to stop sooner or later, and then you still have to decide what to do.”
I am taking a lot of hope in grace today. Anne Lamott writes, “Sometimes grace is like water wings when you are sinking.” I feel a little bit like I am sinking, but God’s grace is saving me from fully going under. That means a lot to me, you know, because I literally do not know how to swim.
My mouth is not big enough for my wisdom teeth, so I may or may not be in constant pain and may or may not want to do nothing else but constantly complain. I am, however, resisting that urge to complain.
I just want to grow in truth and grace.